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Musings

She

Updated: Sep 10, 2023

I don't want to face a younger me

And tell her it doesn't get better.


Tell her she is let down by society.


Her goodness does not matter.


People will hurt her and they wont think twice.

_________________________________________


She will spend time stuck and lonely

Sad and overwhelmed by the evil of the world.

_________________________________________


She will grow

But growth will be a survival mechanism to try and escape.

____________________________________________________


She will do everything she can

But the evil will hold on tight.

__________________________


She will wake up crying.


She will no longer have nightmares.


Nothing will be as terrifying as her lived experience.


Her dreams some nights will be the only safety and comfort she experiences for weeks.

_____________________________________________________________________________


She does have a support system.


Her counselor will be a kind, gentle person that cries during difficult sessions.


Who has nothing to offer

No way to help her.


She will watch family and friends contort themselves trying to help

But they will be helpless.


Nothing will ever be enough to make her whole again.

________________________________________________


There will be a time before and a time after.


Because that's what trauma does.



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